New Words - Tartle & Quanked

I think we each have experienced times where we have tartled. It’s a really uncomfortable situation and it momentarily stuns us.

The word is tartle, not turtle or tattle, and certainly not tooted!

Tartle is a panicky hesitation just before you have to introduce someone whose name you suddenly can't remember.

We have all had this happen right? It is so embarrassing especially if it happens with someone you know well. It is one of those “times” that seems to stay with you and the other person for years, at least they may bring it up for years.

I still remember my husband introducing me by the wrong name. I was horrified- but soon realized he only swapped the name of the person he was introducing me to with mine. Could happen to anyone!

Lately I feel “quanked”, I mean really and truly.

Quanked means to be overpowered by fatigue, a great word!

The treatment that I received and my bodies reaction to it has left me with limited energy. Yup “quanked”.

Let me explain “immune therapy” treatment for you. You are given some drugs designed to perk up your bodies own antibodies. It’s kind of like a jolt to your own immune system. If your body reacts to the drugs, then your own antibodies are activated, put on high alert and set out to destroy harmful cells in your body. The medicine can stay in your body for months and up to years.

This kind of treatment has a 50/50 chance of working. It also comes with a 50/50 chance of your own antibodies attacking your own cells or organs.

You need to know this going in because there’s a chance something else in your body may get harmed. I have heard stories of people being cancer free but another part of their body got attacked and sometimes worse. I have heard the stories of people having much success with the treatments. There are risks each way you look at it, educating yourself and praying lots is a must.

The doctor said we can put the antibodies in and get your own stirred up but we cannot direct them.

My body decided it did not like the medication and proceeded to have an allergic reaction. This produced a few things, it started with a rash, swelling, a few blisters. But not life threatening- certainly uncomfortable and not pretty. It still lingers.

As the weeks went by, I started noticing a few other things. The tiredness was certainly alarming and frustrating. The brain fog is downright annoying. For me the worst is the body aches. It is not my joints, it is like my tissues. I thunk and tried to describe it, the best I could get is “think MS and fibromyalgia.” It is called myositis, my antibodies attacked my muscles. I cannot sit too long in one position, I cannot walk too long, laying in one position too long is not great either, clumsy is now a new issue plus add on the, I hurt all over sensation.

I discovered the clumsy part on a mini 2 step ladder and couldn’t figure why I kept falling off.

For the doctors, the intense climb of my liver enzymes caused all of us to have a couple sleepless nights.

Then my thyroid decided it had had enough.

I have so many people praying and I feel like I got another miracle. In spite of what I just wrote, my bloodwork Monday, 2 days ago, showed my liver is dropping back down almost as quickly as it rose up. We are all gladly stunned and I call it a miracle! It’s not back to normal but it’s looking good. I am scheduled for weekly blood work for the next while. Do I feel instantly better - no not yet and probably will not for a while. My body is fighting- hard. I have four systems out of whack plus fighting those cells we are hoping to eliminate thoroughly.

I cannot have another PET scan to check for the “c” cells until the end of May. It’s radioactive and you cannot get it done too much. But can I say- one of my enlarged lymph node’s has disappeared! That is another miracle right there!

I had a friend tell me that I must be putting on a brave face because not many people know all these side affects and my pain. But how could they? If I am not doing well I simply stay home. I have had to miss many functions and events because I have made me the first priority. There are times where I cannot drive or perhaps do not trust myself to drive. Other times I have to park on my couch and take the day off, but I do have a comfy couch. 😊

Glen, my oldest son lives with me and he takes up the slack and takes care of his momma. Gord and Ray and their families are out often helping us out as well. I’m never stuck, the Calvary is close by. Yes I would love to have my full strength and thinking power back, but that is not for this season. One of my doctors always informs me, “do not forget even with these marvellous miracles that you are in a fight for your life. You are bound to be tired.”

I sent this photo out to a few friends. Many replied “in the front seat please.”

I did not send any other information or direction. I sense that the ones who wanted the front seat thought I would be in it sharing it with them. Hahaha - I would not be on this ride, I hate roller coasters! Yet many of you pictured me there, didn’t you? Right there in the front, nope I would be cheerleading you from the ground.

If I ever did get on a roller coaster, well it would not be pretty. I would probably burst your ear drums from the screaming all the while throwing up in your lap or all over your shoes.

We really never know all about what a person thinks, feels or is going through, we can only guess where we think they will be on the ride. Often we will be wrong, just as I would not ride a roller coaster, I do not want to ride the wild adventure my body is on now. I have even said, “no thanks, I want off this circus” but no one listens. This fact alone should make us kinder, you never know what someone is going through or if they got stuck on a ride they never signed up for. Same ride, this life, but different reactions, row 1 & 2 enjoy the ride while 3 certainly is a more serious type. Then there is the ones on the ground laughing and videoing your reaction to it all!

I cannot preplan a lot right now as I never know what kind of day it will be, a couch or good day. Even saying that, I do not usually get a full “good” day, there is only so much energy.

Just when I think I’m done, I’m giving up, this is too hard, another miracle slides in, it can be in the form of people or lab results or even nature. Miracles are heavenly gifts and we cannot demand one, but they can get dropped into your lap by God at the most unexpected time, in a most unexpected but beautiful way. These miracle gifts bolster your heart and faith, we must always be watching for them or we may miss them, they come in many forms, many styles but always from the heart of God. Miracles happen daily.